~Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche
An Excerpt from Awakening the Luminous Mind
When fear or anxiety dominates your mind, you don’t know where to
go. By turning toward stillness, silence, and spaciousness, you will
feel some protection. Even if you cannot fully connect, trusting that
space is there is a form of protection from fear. You will begin to
taste the confidence that becomes increasingly available the more direct
personal experience you have with the inner refuge. The reason the
inner refuge overcomes fear is that the natural state is beyond fear. It
is beyond fear because the unbounded space of being is unchanging. So
if you are aware of a deeper state in yourself that is unchanging, and
become familiar with that deeper state, you naturally become less
fearful.
The
natural state of mind is beyond birth and death. At death, it is only
ego that loses. We will explore this more fully later in the book, but
for now we can say that being in that space is the experience of
openness that is deathless, changeless. Nothing changes. So when I
become more familiar with that particular aspect, when I taste this
sense of changelessness, a deep confidence and peace become available.
This is not a confidence produced by thinking or having a philosophical
point of view. Rather, it is a direct experience that is possible by
recognizing what is already here.
So with the pain body or identity, we “take the white pill” and turn
toward stillness; with pain speech, we “take the red pill” and turn
toward silence; and with pain mind, we “take the blue pill” and turn
toward spaciousness. As we enter the experiences of stillness, silence,
and spaciousness, our pain becomes the path to liberation. Each
condition transforms into a path that leads to our final
liberation—connection with the changeless essence.
You may think this is an oversimplification or a watered-down
instruction. Does it seem too simple to be true? The dzogchen masters
explain that the true nature of mind is so close we cannot see it. We
all know how much we love complicated things. Whatever is harder to get
we think is better. For some people, the biggest problem is always
wanting something they can’t get, and because of that desire they cannot
see what they already have. The simple but profound truth is that the
greatest thing we have is this present moment. Therein lies the greatest
richness possible. But we don’t see or experience ourselves fully in
the present moment.
So whenever you feel pain, just be with it. Be a good support to your
pain. Have a warm presence that is completely open and most important,
nonjudgmental. Just be there hosting your pain. People in the West often
have a problem with stillness, silence, and spaciousness. When you are
still, then you start looking for a problem. When you are silent, others
get suspicious and think there is a problem. When you are spacious,
others may think you’re not very bright. A cultural shock that I
experienced when I first came to the United States was the mantra “I’m
busy.” Everybody says this. If you say, “I’m not busy,” then something
must be wrong with you. If someone asks, “What do you do?” and you
reply, “Nothing much,” that person will think, “Something has got to be
wrong here. This is not normal.”
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Wake up to your life
Shift your attention to joy
~Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche
It is most important to acknowledge the existence of our pain identity and to have the proper relation to it. Often, pain goes unrecognized. For instance, you could be sitting on a bench in a beautiful park waiting to meet a friend for lunch. Perhaps you are checking your e-mail on your phone without hearing the birds or seeing the play of light on the trees. Physically you are breathing, but you may have no connection with your body. You could be caught up in your thoughts about some work issues, strategizing various solutions. Nothing is truly fresh and alive when you are caught up in your habitual patterns of body, speech, and mind. And it is not that easy to recognize these habitual patterns unless your discomfort becomes more acute. There are many in-between moments in our lives when we are waiting for the next “event.” These are excellent opportunities to turn to the refuge. We can be anywhere—in a business meeting or at a lovely celebration—and recognize that we are not fully present. The bottom line is that we are often distracted and disconnected from our own creative energies and from what the natural environment and others have to offer. Each of us can find many opportunities throughout the day to become aware of habitual disconnection and to shift our attention to the refuge.
Until you recognize your pain identity, whether you experience it as boredom, disconnection, or some other manifestation of discomfort, no path of healing is available. Recognizing pain is the first step on the journey to awakening the sacred body, authentic speech, and luminous mind.
Directly in the midst of a bored, confused, or agitated experience, simply draw your attention to your body, and experience the stillness that becomes available. As you find stillness again and again, you will begin to realize that it is always available. It is a matter of turning your attention to the right place. Finding stillness sounds so simple that perhaps you might think it is not very convincing as a remedy for your problems. And because it is so simple it can take years or a lifetime for someone to make that shift of drawing attention inward to discover what becomes available when they do so. Many do not make that shift and will always perceive the world as dangerous and threatening. But if you are able to make that shift of attention again and again, it can cause a remarkable transformation of your experience of yourself and the world. It is important to know that at any given moment of challenge or pain, there is another way to experience that very moment. Connect with the fundamental stillness of being. It is already there, but unrecognized.
When there are competing internal voices, hear the silence. It is right there, within those voices. We do not listen to inner silence or have a good relationship to it. We are drawn again and again to the stimulation and distraction of inner dialogue, negotiating and rehearsing. And we are pleased when we come up with a good strategy. At other times we try not to think about something that is bothering us, and with effort push it out of our minds, distracting ourselves with other things. Whether we arrive at what we consider a good strategy or actively distract ourselves from thinking about something, it is all pain speech from the point of view of the inner refuge. As we listen to the silence that is truly available in any given moment, whether we are in the middle of a busy airport or sitting at a holiday dinner table, our inner voices dissolve. These are the moments when something fresh and alive becomes available.
Source
~Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche
It is most important to acknowledge the existence of our pain identity and to have the proper relation to it. Often, pain goes unrecognized. For instance, you could be sitting on a bench in a beautiful park waiting to meet a friend for lunch. Perhaps you are checking your e-mail on your phone without hearing the birds or seeing the play of light on the trees. Physically you are breathing, but you may have no connection with your body. You could be caught up in your thoughts about some work issues, strategizing various solutions. Nothing is truly fresh and alive when you are caught up in your habitual patterns of body, speech, and mind. And it is not that easy to recognize these habitual patterns unless your discomfort becomes more acute. There are many in-between moments in our lives when we are waiting for the next “event.” These are excellent opportunities to turn to the refuge. We can be anywhere—in a business meeting or at a lovely celebration—and recognize that we are not fully present. The bottom line is that we are often distracted and disconnected from our own creative energies and from what the natural environment and others have to offer. Each of us can find many opportunities throughout the day to become aware of habitual disconnection and to shift our attention to the refuge.
Until you recognize your pain identity, whether you experience it as boredom, disconnection, or some other manifestation of discomfort, no path of healing is available. Recognizing pain is the first step on the journey to awakening the sacred body, authentic speech, and luminous mind.
Directly in the midst of a bored, confused, or agitated experience, simply draw your attention to your body, and experience the stillness that becomes available. As you find stillness again and again, you will begin to realize that it is always available. It is a matter of turning your attention to the right place. Finding stillness sounds so simple that perhaps you might think it is not very convincing as a remedy for your problems. And because it is so simple it can take years or a lifetime for someone to make that shift of drawing attention inward to discover what becomes available when they do so. Many do not make that shift and will always perceive the world as dangerous and threatening. But if you are able to make that shift of attention again and again, it can cause a remarkable transformation of your experience of yourself and the world. It is important to know that at any given moment of challenge or pain, there is another way to experience that very moment. Connect with the fundamental stillness of being. It is already there, but unrecognized.
When there are competing internal voices, hear the silence. It is right there, within those voices. We do not listen to inner silence or have a good relationship to it. We are drawn again and again to the stimulation and distraction of inner dialogue, negotiating and rehearsing. And we are pleased when we come up with a good strategy. At other times we try not to think about something that is bothering us, and with effort push it out of our minds, distracting ourselves with other things. Whether we arrive at what we consider a good strategy or actively distract ourselves from thinking about something, it is all pain speech from the point of view of the inner refuge. As we listen to the silence that is truly available in any given moment, whether we are in the middle of a busy airport or sitting at a holiday dinner table, our inner voices dissolve. These are the moments when something fresh and alive becomes available.
Source
The Great Perfection of Creativity
From the profound teachings of Dzogchen, the Great Perfection, Geshe Tenzin Wangyal teaches us how to unleash powerful creative energy we can use anywhere, from the office to the art studio.
There is little in life that does not require at least some measure of creativity.
Whether you are trying to compose a symphony, write an essay, find a job, cook a meal, or express an opinion, you cannot achieve your goal if you are not creative. But the fruits of your efforts will depend, in good part, on how you define creativity. According to the Dzogchen (Great Perfection) teachings of Vajrayana Buddhism, true creativity has to do with more than just ability or skill, or even actions or behaviors. While those play an important role, creativity ultimately has to do with our state of being.
Creativity can be seen as a state of natural flow, one that spontaneously and effortlessly gives birth not only to manifest form, but to all experiences of body, energy, and mind. This state of flow, which has its roots in openness, occurs only in the absence of hope and fear. It is at once naturally joyful, peaceful, compassionate, expansive, and powerful.
When you know how to tap fully into this open, creative flow, its beneficial qualities can extend to any area of your life. You can paint more masterful paintings. Your music can have more depth of connection. Your writing can be more genuine and moving. You will be able to solve problems at work, resolve conflicts with loved ones, or even shift your thought patterns with more natural spontaneity.
The Wrong Way to Create
Let’s say your creative goal for today is something very utilitarian—to convince your boss that you deserve a promotion. You know this new job opening is meant for you; you have been thinking about it for weeks. But you know skill will be needed to sell the idea to your boss.
If you enter the meeting with him or her feeling positive and spacious, you are far more likely to present a skillful argument from a place of genuine self-confidence, connection, and enthusiasm. These are qualities any boss would treasure in an employee.
Most people, however, seek solutions from a place where the creative flow is blocked and, as a result, their words and actions are contrived and effortful. For example, imagine that on the morning of the day you are meeting with your boss, you wake up in a bad mood. For whatever reason, you are feeling a little depressed, pessimistic, edgy. The problem is self-image; you identify with the negative energy. You think, “I am feeling bad,” or “Something is wrong with me this morning.” It’s a familiar feeling of unworthiness we often wake up to.
Let’s say you don’t do anything to clear the negative energy. You sit on your bad mood as usual. so as the appointed meeting with your boss approaches, it is from this place of negative self-image that you begin to feel nervous. You sit with agitation and your mind becomes increasingly active. You wonder: “Has my co-worker already been chosen for the new position?” “Has anyone even noticed all my contributions at work?” “That mistake I made last month—will my boss hold it against me?”
If these thoughts continue, then by the time you sit down across the table from your boss, you will actively be trying to hide your fear and agitation. You are dressed professionally, speaking well, expressing all your well-rehearsed arguments for why you deserve the promotion, but the right causes and conditions are not realized internally. No matter how well you smile or speak, your words come out as planned and effortful.
Instead of seeing genuine confidence and enthusiasm, your boss will instead sense conflict and doubt behind a confident facade. At best your boss will assume this is due to nerves. At worst, he or she will conclude that you doubt your own ability to take on new responsibilities. Maybe that promotion is not right for you.
There is little in life that does not require at least some measure of creativity.
Whether you are trying to compose a symphony, write an essay, find a job, cook a meal, or express an opinion, you cannot achieve your goal if you are not creative. But the fruits of your efforts will depend, in good part, on how you define creativity. According to the Dzogchen (Great Perfection) teachings of Vajrayana Buddhism, true creativity has to do with more than just ability or skill, or even actions or behaviors. While those play an important role, creativity ultimately has to do with our state of being.
Creativity can be seen as a state of natural flow, one that spontaneously and effortlessly gives birth not only to manifest form, but to all experiences of body, energy, and mind. This state of flow, which has its roots in openness, occurs only in the absence of hope and fear. It is at once naturally joyful, peaceful, compassionate, expansive, and powerful.
When you know how to tap fully into this open, creative flow, its beneficial qualities can extend to any area of your life. You can paint more masterful paintings. Your music can have more depth of connection. Your writing can be more genuine and moving. You will be able to solve problems at work, resolve conflicts with loved ones, or even shift your thought patterns with more natural spontaneity.
The Wrong Way to Create
Let’s say your creative goal for today is something very utilitarian—to convince your boss that you deserve a promotion. You know this new job opening is meant for you; you have been thinking about it for weeks. But you know skill will be needed to sell the idea to your boss.
If you enter the meeting with him or her feeling positive and spacious, you are far more likely to present a skillful argument from a place of genuine self-confidence, connection, and enthusiasm. These are qualities any boss would treasure in an employee.
Most people, however, seek solutions from a place where the creative flow is blocked and, as a result, their words and actions are contrived and effortful. For example, imagine that on the morning of the day you are meeting with your boss, you wake up in a bad mood. For whatever reason, you are feeling a little depressed, pessimistic, edgy. The problem is self-image; you identify with the negative energy. You think, “I am feeling bad,” or “Something is wrong with me this morning.” It’s a familiar feeling of unworthiness we often wake up to.
Let’s say you don’t do anything to clear the negative energy. You sit on your bad mood as usual. so as the appointed meeting with your boss approaches, it is from this place of negative self-image that you begin to feel nervous. You sit with agitation and your mind becomes increasingly active. You wonder: “Has my co-worker already been chosen for the new position?” “Has anyone even noticed all my contributions at work?” “That mistake I made last month—will my boss hold it against me?”
If these thoughts continue, then by the time you sit down across the table from your boss, you will actively be trying to hide your fear and agitation. You are dressed professionally, speaking well, expressing all your well-rehearsed arguments for why you deserve the promotion, but the right causes and conditions are not realized internally. No matter how well you smile or speak, your words come out as planned and effortful.
Instead of seeing genuine confidence and enthusiasm, your boss will instead sense conflict and doubt behind a confident facade. At best your boss will assume this is due to nerves. At worst, he or she will conclude that you doubt your own ability to take on new responsibilities. Maybe that promotion is not right for you.
Discovering the True Nature of Mind
~Geshe Tenzin Wangyal
Geshe Tenzin Wangyal teaches us a five-stage Dzogchen meditation that begins with contemplating our worst enemy and culminates in the discovery that mind is empty, clear and blissful.
Vision is mind.
Mind is empty.
Emptiness is clear light.
Clear light is union.
Union is great bliss.
This is the heart instruction of Dawa Gyaltsen, a Bön meditation master who lived in the eighth century. Bön is the native, pre-Buddhist religion of Tibet, which has incorporated many Buddhist elements. This teaching is a direct introduction to the nature of mind and is not elaborate with ritual. The pith instructions of these masters—their heart advice to their students—are often only a few lines, but these few lines can guide the fortunate practitioner to recognizing his or her own true nature as Buddha.
Vision is mind
How do we work with Dawa Gyaltsen's instruction, which begins, "Vision is mind"? Vision includes everything we perceive, but I suggest that you use what bothers you as an entrance to this practice. Do you have a famous person in your life? The famous person is the one who seems to be born to create a problem for you, as if that were his or her number-one mission in life. Sometimes we feel there are people like that. Such people can make trouble for you not only with their presence, but with one single postcard sent to you. When you see the postcard with their handwriting on it, you are immediately disturbed.
So we begin our meditation practice with this famous person as our starting point. Create a protected environment and sit in a comfortable upright position. Now invite the image of your famous person to come into your awareness. They always come anyway, but this time you are inviting them so that you can look more deeply into this experience. What exactly is this famous person composed of? See the image of the person, the character of this person who bothers you so much. Sense the energetic or emotional presence of this person. When your famous person was born, he or she did not show any physical signs or marks of what you now see. And not all people share your view of this person. What you perceive is your mind, your karmic vision, which is more karma than vision.
So in this moment, instead of looking out and focusing on that person, look inward. Step back and let the experience come in. Do not step forward but step backwards. Don't go to your office and make phone calls and send emails. Just sit and close your eyes and reflect on this person, and experience what you're experiencing at this very moment. This is your vision. It is very much in you, in your mind. That famous person is now an image or a felt sense. Perhaps you have a sense of being contracted, closed or agitated in the presence of this person; feel this fully, not simply with your intellect. Sit with the image of your famous person, and with the resulting feelings and sensations, until you recognize that this experience is in you, and you conclude, "Vision is mind."
Geshe Tenzin Wangyal teaches us a five-stage Dzogchen meditation that begins with contemplating our worst enemy and culminates in the discovery that mind is empty, clear and blissful.
Vision is mind.
Mind is empty.
Emptiness is clear light.
Clear light is union.
Union is great bliss.
This is the heart instruction of Dawa Gyaltsen, a Bön meditation master who lived in the eighth century. Bön is the native, pre-Buddhist religion of Tibet, which has incorporated many Buddhist elements. This teaching is a direct introduction to the nature of mind and is not elaborate with ritual. The pith instructions of these masters—their heart advice to their students—are often only a few lines, but these few lines can guide the fortunate practitioner to recognizing his or her own true nature as Buddha.
Vision is mind
How do we work with Dawa Gyaltsen's instruction, which begins, "Vision is mind"? Vision includes everything we perceive, but I suggest that you use what bothers you as an entrance to this practice. Do you have a famous person in your life? The famous person is the one who seems to be born to create a problem for you, as if that were his or her number-one mission in life. Sometimes we feel there are people like that. Such people can make trouble for you not only with their presence, but with one single postcard sent to you. When you see the postcard with their handwriting on it, you are immediately disturbed.
So we begin our meditation practice with this famous person as our starting point. Create a protected environment and sit in a comfortable upright position. Now invite the image of your famous person to come into your awareness. They always come anyway, but this time you are inviting them so that you can look more deeply into this experience. What exactly is this famous person composed of? See the image of the person, the character of this person who bothers you so much. Sense the energetic or emotional presence of this person. When your famous person was born, he or she did not show any physical signs or marks of what you now see. And not all people share your view of this person. What you perceive is your mind, your karmic vision, which is more karma than vision.
So in this moment, instead of looking out and focusing on that person, look inward. Step back and let the experience come in. Do not step forward but step backwards. Don't go to your office and make phone calls and send emails. Just sit and close your eyes and reflect on this person, and experience what you're experiencing at this very moment. This is your vision. It is very much in you, in your mind. That famous person is now an image or a felt sense. Perhaps you have a sense of being contracted, closed or agitated in the presence of this person; feel this fully, not simply with your intellect. Sit with the image of your famous person, and with the resulting feelings and sensations, until you recognize that this experience is in you, and you conclude, "Vision is mind."
Reconnecting With Ourselves
~Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche
In order to heal our painful habits, says Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche, we need to turn our attention inward and reconnect with our experience through stillness, silence, and spaciousness. Through the negative, habitual patterns of distraction and restlessness, we frequently disconnect from ourselves. As a result, we are often depleted, for we do not fully receive what life offers, what nature offers, or what other people offer, and we don’t recognize opportunities to benefit others. You may be sitting on a bench in a beautiful park, yet not be seeing the trees, hearing the birds, or smelling the blossoms. Perhaps you are distracted with your cellphone or worrying about something, and though you are breathing you may have no actual relationship to your body, your speech, your mind, or to the park. I refer to this as sitting on a rotten karmic cushion.
This can happen anywhere—in a business meeting or at the family dinner table. You may even be at a lovely party, but your mind is not part of the celebration. Caught up in thoughts about some problem, we strategize solutions, but this never brings satisfaction because it never reconnects us to ourselves. In truth, our thoughts and strategies are the imaginations of our pain body, pain speech, and pain mind—the ego or identity we mistake as “me” simply because it is so familiar. Trying to improve ego does not bring liberation from suffering; it only reinforces the disconnection.
It is very important to acknowledge that suffering exists and to have the proper relationship with it. The root cause of suffering is ignorance, the failure to recognize the true nature of mind, which is always open and clear and the source of all positive qualities. By failing to recognize our true nature, we search for happiness outside ourselves. This fundamental disconnection from the actual source of positive qualities within, and the restless search for satisfaction outside ourselves is something we do habitually, yet we often don’t even experience this as suffering because it doesn’t seem all that dramatic.
Until we recognize this pain identity and truly acknowledge our own disconnection, there is no path of healing available and we will not realize our full potential in this life. So acknowledging suffering is the first step, and a beautiful one, because it is the first step on the journey to awakening the sacred body, authentic speech, and luminous mind—which is who we truly are when we are fully present in each moment.
Discovering Inner Refuge
We begin by acknowledging the habitual patterns that arise from our disconnection from ourselves, which I refer to as pain body, pain speech, and pain mind. We may experience this disconnection in a variety of ways, such as irritation, boredom, restlessness, sadness, or an underlying feeling that something is missing. If we are to heal or awaken from these patterns, we need to generate a caring relationship with the evidence of our disconnection. Recall how you feel supported when you are with a friend who is simply present, open, and nonjudgmental, and bring those very qualities to your own experience. The silence containing this fullness of the presence of another is always there within you and always beautiful. So that is exactly how you need to experience your pain. Connect with stillness, silence, and spaciousness, which enables you to observe, allow, and feel whatever you experience without judgment.
So often we identify with our pain—I am so sad. I can’t believe you said that to me. You hurt me. Who is this me that is sad, angry, and hurt? It is one thing to experience pain; it is another thing to be pain. This self is ego and the fundamental suffering of ego is that it has no connection to what is.
In the middle of a confused or disconnected experience, or even at a seemingly ordinary moment, draw your attention inward. Do you experience the stillness that becomes available? It sounds easy and therefore may not seem very convincing as a remedy for suffering, yet it can take years or even a lifetime to make that simple shift and discover what becomes available when you do. Some people may not make the shift and may always perceive the world as potentially dangerous and threatening. But if you’re able to make that shift again and again, it can transform your identity and experience. Being aware of a moment of agitation or restlessness and knowing there is another way to experience it—to turn one’s attention inward and connect with the fundamental stillness of being—is the discovery of inner refuge through stillness.
In order to heal our painful habits, says Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche, we need to turn our attention inward and reconnect with our experience through stillness, silence, and spaciousness. Through the negative, habitual patterns of distraction and restlessness, we frequently disconnect from ourselves. As a result, we are often depleted, for we do not fully receive what life offers, what nature offers, or what other people offer, and we don’t recognize opportunities to benefit others. You may be sitting on a bench in a beautiful park, yet not be seeing the trees, hearing the birds, or smelling the blossoms. Perhaps you are distracted with your cellphone or worrying about something, and though you are breathing you may have no actual relationship to your body, your speech, your mind, or to the park. I refer to this as sitting on a rotten karmic cushion.
This can happen anywhere—in a business meeting or at the family dinner table. You may even be at a lovely party, but your mind is not part of the celebration. Caught up in thoughts about some problem, we strategize solutions, but this never brings satisfaction because it never reconnects us to ourselves. In truth, our thoughts and strategies are the imaginations of our pain body, pain speech, and pain mind—the ego or identity we mistake as “me” simply because it is so familiar. Trying to improve ego does not bring liberation from suffering; it only reinforces the disconnection.
It is very important to acknowledge that suffering exists and to have the proper relationship with it. The root cause of suffering is ignorance, the failure to recognize the true nature of mind, which is always open and clear and the source of all positive qualities. By failing to recognize our true nature, we search for happiness outside ourselves. This fundamental disconnection from the actual source of positive qualities within, and the restless search for satisfaction outside ourselves is something we do habitually, yet we often don’t even experience this as suffering because it doesn’t seem all that dramatic.
Until we recognize this pain identity and truly acknowledge our own disconnection, there is no path of healing available and we will not realize our full potential in this life. So acknowledging suffering is the first step, and a beautiful one, because it is the first step on the journey to awakening the sacred body, authentic speech, and luminous mind—which is who we truly are when we are fully present in each moment.
Discovering Inner Refuge
We begin by acknowledging the habitual patterns that arise from our disconnection from ourselves, which I refer to as pain body, pain speech, and pain mind. We may experience this disconnection in a variety of ways, such as irritation, boredom, restlessness, sadness, or an underlying feeling that something is missing. If we are to heal or awaken from these patterns, we need to generate a caring relationship with the evidence of our disconnection. Recall how you feel supported when you are with a friend who is simply present, open, and nonjudgmental, and bring those very qualities to your own experience. The silence containing this fullness of the presence of another is always there within you and always beautiful. So that is exactly how you need to experience your pain. Connect with stillness, silence, and spaciousness, which enables you to observe, allow, and feel whatever you experience without judgment.
So often we identify with our pain—I am so sad. I can’t believe you said that to me. You hurt me. Who is this me that is sad, angry, and hurt? It is one thing to experience pain; it is another thing to be pain. This self is ego and the fundamental suffering of ego is that it has no connection to what is.
In the middle of a confused or disconnected experience, or even at a seemingly ordinary moment, draw your attention inward. Do you experience the stillness that becomes available? It sounds easy and therefore may not seem very convincing as a remedy for suffering, yet it can take years or even a lifetime to make that simple shift and discover what becomes available when you do. Some people may not make the shift and may always perceive the world as potentially dangerous and threatening. But if you’re able to make that shift again and again, it can transform your identity and experience. Being aware of a moment of agitation or restlessness and knowing there is another way to experience it—to turn one’s attention inward and connect with the fundamental stillness of being—is the discovery of inner refuge through stillness.
Everyday Life is the Practice
~Geshe Tenzin Wangyal
Leaving everyday life and committing yourself to formal meditation practice is one way to enter the dharma, as demonstrated by the many yogis practicing in remote places and monks and nuns living a simple monastic lifestyle. Perhaps in your own life, you are considering this approach. You may be retired and financially secure and can clearly decide that this is the time to completely commit your life to practice, renouncing your ordinary lifestyle. For most of us in the West, however, it is hard to leave our lives in order to practice dharma. In fact, to do so could cause harm to our family and loved ones. So we have no alternative but to bring our dharma practice fully into our lives, which is just as valid an approach as leaving our life behind to practice dharma.
There are certainly times when you can leave your daily working life—times for learning and for personal retreats—but these events should not be the primary emphasis of your spiritual development. Such special occasions are opportunities to gain a clearer idea of how to practice and to find some perspective as you reflect upon how you are going to integrate practice into your life. But you should not depend on them to grow and achieve liberation.
A conflict may emerge for those of us who pay bills and have children and have an ordinary, beautiful life. We feel creative and self-motivated within our ordinary life. We also know the value of formal practice, yet that sometimes conflicts with family or job responsibilities. On top of that, we don't even know if we are making progress in our practice, because we feel we are not doing it enough. Many times, with the pressures of daily life, we find ourselves saying "Oh, I didn't do any formal practice at all last week. I am a bad practitioner. I committed to do this, and now I just dropped everything." We feel bad about ourselves and our path.
So we end up with a big gap between the reality of our everyday lives and our formal meditation, and big gaps like this are a problem. Because we are consumed by the fact that we are not practicing enough, we don't apply the antidotes we learned to counteract our habitual patterns. We don't deepen our experiences of practice. Overall, we are uncertain how to judge the success of our meditation practice. We are not skillful enough to bring the practice into our lives and build a bridge between dharma and the challenges of everyday life, including the many relationships it involves.
To illustrate this gap, I give the example of a friend of mine who wants to have a loving relationship with her mother. Fighting and arguing between them has been a pattern for a long time. Since her mother is quite old, she wants to change this pattern of arguing. She is now determined to make a change. With this in mind, she plans for a wonderful time with her mother on a weekend visit, thinking "I'm going to try my best, take some time off, and spend quality time with my mother. We will go out for dinner and a movie. We’ll relax together and enjoy each other’s company." On Friday, as she leaves work and drives out of the city, she encounters lots of traffic and arrives late. When she arrives, her mother opens the door with, "You're late," followed by, "Oh, what have you done to your hair?" That is just enough to awaken the old karma, the spontaneous manifestation of the same mother and the same daughter, and they are back in the same argument. Sparks fly.
There are certainly times when you can leave your daily working life—times for learning and for personal retreats—but these events should not be the primary emphasis of your spiritual development. Such special occasions are opportunities to gain a clearer idea of how to practice and to find some perspective as you reflect upon how you are going to integrate practice into your life. But you should not depend on them to grow and achieve liberation.
A conflict may emerge for those of us who pay bills and have children and have an ordinary, beautiful life. We feel creative and self-motivated within our ordinary life. We also know the value of formal practice, yet that sometimes conflicts with family or job responsibilities. On top of that, we don't even know if we are making progress in our practice, because we feel we are not doing it enough. Many times, with the pressures of daily life, we find ourselves saying "Oh, I didn't do any formal practice at all last week. I am a bad practitioner. I committed to do this, and now I just dropped everything." We feel bad about ourselves and our path.
So we end up with a big gap between the reality of our everyday lives and our formal meditation, and big gaps like this are a problem. Because we are consumed by the fact that we are not practicing enough, we don't apply the antidotes we learned to counteract our habitual patterns. We don't deepen our experiences of practice. Overall, we are uncertain how to judge the success of our meditation practice. We are not skillful enough to bring the practice into our lives and build a bridge between dharma and the challenges of everyday life, including the many relationships it involves.
To illustrate this gap, I give the example of a friend of mine who wants to have a loving relationship with her mother. Fighting and arguing between them has been a pattern for a long time. Since her mother is quite old, she wants to change this pattern of arguing. She is now determined to make a change. With this in mind, she plans for a wonderful time with her mother on a weekend visit, thinking "I'm going to try my best, take some time off, and spend quality time with my mother. We will go out for dinner and a movie. We’ll relax together and enjoy each other’s company." On Friday, as she leaves work and drives out of the city, she encounters lots of traffic and arrives late. When she arrives, her mother opens the door with, "You're late," followed by, "Oh, what have you done to your hair?" That is just enough to awaken the old karma, the spontaneous manifestation of the same mother and the same daughter, and they are back in the same argument. Sparks fly.
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